Au pairs in Germany: When a dream job becomes a nightmare

For a young person looking to explore the world, the offer can sound tempting: Go to Germany, take care of children and live with a nice family. It can be the first step toward learning a new language, studying and starting life as an independent adult.

It works out for many. But not for everyone. Ana da Silva, from Brazil, found that out firsthand. After just a few months in Germany, she told DW she was working far more than the agreed 30 hours a week.

Da Silva, whose name has been changed to protect her privacy, spent her days more as a house cleaner than a babysitter. Her food was rationed, she said, sometimes amounting to just a piece of bread. Her complaints were met with threats.

"I was with five families, one worse than the other," da Silva said, likening her experience to slavery. "Germany has no idea what happens here with au pairs. It's crazy. As an au pair, nobody helps you."

Photos and text messages reviewed by DW support da Silva's accusations. They also fit a pattern, which turns "au pair," in the French sense of mutual benefit, into an abuse of power by those who employ the young helpers.

Exception or rule?

"This is clearly unacceptable and violates the terms of use that all families and au pairs agree to when registering to use the platform," the online agency that handled da Silva told DW in a statement.

Her experience represents only a "fraction" of experiences, the agency added.

Au pair contracts cap work at 30 hours per week, and allow for one-and-a-half days off. Au pairs are to receive €280 ($304) in expenses each month and an additional €70 to put toward German language courses.

These rules are often ignored, au pair advocates say — a thorn in the side of aboveboard au pair agencies.

"Our agencies always insist that the focus of working hours is on child care and that chores be done along with the family," Cordula Walter-Bolhöfer, who works at Gütegemeinschaft Au Pair, an umbrella organization representing 30 of Germany's 100 au pair agencies.

"Au pairs are not supposed to be cheap household helpers," she added.

Lack of oversight

One source of exploitation is the lack of licensing. Since 2002, au pair agencies have only needed a business license to operate, with no additional certification. Other would-be au pairs get connected to host families over social media or so-called "matching" platforms where there is little control.

"When they see photos of nice families with nice children on Facebook, for example, many believe that this is the truth," said Walter-Bolhöfer.

When problems arise in these cases, au pairs have no contact person. That's when someone like Susanne Flegel steps in. She has been running an agency for more than 17 years and helps au pairs in trouble.

"There was a time when we had several calls a day. Politicians claim that these are isolated cases. But they are not isolated cases," she told DW. "When we ask various au pairs, they say exploitation is common."

Statistics are hard to come by as none are officially recorded. Agencies have a financial incentive to make au pair connections happen, earning between €200 and €1,000 per au pair placement, Flegel said.

"There are also actual criminal agencies in Germany because they are not checked. The host families themselves can also be swindled," she added.

In the Netherlands, agencies can be fined

The problem is not unique to Germany. Across the border in the Netherlands, authorities reinstituted licensing and liability 10 years ago. An agency that runs afoul of the rules can face heavy fines.

Flegel and other au pair advocates would like to see German lawmakers do more, too. She has called for more requirements, such as official licensing.

"And there still need to be random and unannounced visits at families," she said.

This article was originally written in German.

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