Tugce: Sympathy - and then what?

One day after the funeral of Tugce Albayrak, Germany is still engrossed in the fate of this brave young woman. More and more politicians are calling for her to be awarded a posthumous Order of Merit. On social networks people are asking themselves whether they too would have had the courage to come to the defense of a person who was being harassed, and to put their lives at risk in so doing. And in workplaces around the country the conversation was all about the funeral the previous day.

1,500 people came to pay their last respects to Tugce on Wednesday, 03.12.2014. The victim, who died as a result of a fatal beating she received on 15.11.2014, was buried in Bad Soden-Salmünster, the town where she was born - amid an outpouring of public sympathy.

"Everyone is moved by this," said Zejnep Haliti, one of the mourners at the funeral service. Wrapped in a black winter coat, the young woman told Reuters that Tugce had demonstrated civil courage. "We owe it to her to be here. And we owe it to her parents, too," she said.

When the attention becomes too much

This kind of consolation is important for the relatives of the victims of violence, says Stefan Fritsch from Weisser Ring [White Ring], an aid organization for the victims of crime and their families. "The most important thing for the relatives is to receive condolences, to be heard," says Fritsch. More important than sympathy from outside, though, is the solidarity of the relatives themselves: "Your own family, in which everyone shares the burden of suffering, is the best support. You can create a community of mourning."

It wasn't just the hundreds of people wanting to express their sympathies who surrounded the family at their daughter's funeral. Dozens of cameras were also pointed at them. "As a rule, that gets to be too much," says Fritz of the media interest, which can be huge, especially when dealing with violent crime. "In cases that are reported on by the national media it's an additional burden for those affected to be the focus of so much attention."

"We will miss her smile"

So far, Tugce's family has allowed the public to share their mourning. "We will all miss Tugce; we will miss her warm smile most painfully," her father Ali said in an interview with the the mass-circulation Bild newspaper. And her uncle Yasin told the AP news agency, "She died in the springtime of her life." He said that she had set an example, both in her life and in her death: "I wish none of this were true, but we can't change the reality."

Stefan Frisch from Weisser Ring says that, at first, for some relatives of the victims of violence being in the public eye is a way of dealing with the pain. "There are people who, in the beginning, find that comforting," he says; they are taken notice of, and that is essentially a good thing. But Fritsch adds that this can change: "Especially when public attention moves on. With time, people's interest falls away."

The pain of silence

It's in this period, Fritsch explains, that the relatives become even more acutely aware of their loss and a new phase of suffering can begin. That, at least, has been his experience with other cases. A swift, fair criminal trial is essential in order for them to be able to get through the worst period of their suffering as quickly as possible. "The need for punishment is part of that, and that is entirely legitimate," says Fritsch.

However, it could be months before the presumed culprit stands trial. So far the public prosecutor in Darmstadt has only announced that the young woman died as a result of a "blunt trauma to the head." It has yet to established whether this was from the blow she received or from her subsequent fall. "The investigations being done are very extensive," the prosecutor said. The suspect is in custody and so far has made no comment on the crime.

If he maintains his silence, it could make the pain even worse for Tugce's relatives. An explanation for the crime is decisive in helping them process what has happened, Fritsch explains. Tugce has been laid to rest, but parents and all of her family still have many hard months ahead of them.